My breastfeeding beginnings were not as advertised in the antenatal classes, she didn't just magically attach and start feeding after skin to skin, in fact she point blank refused to open her mouth! My first day and night consisted of a midwife hand expressing tiny drops of colostrum and sucking them up with a syringe. It took a great Health Care Assistant who spent a good couple of hours showing me and my daughter how to latch on before we got the hang of it.
I do breastfeed but I am not part of the breastfeeding lobby; the choice of feeding is entirely personal and I do not want to add to the guilt which surrounds feeding choices.
In England there is a drop off from 84% of mums breastfeeding at birth to 24% of exclusive breastfeeding at 6 weeks, then a further drop to 17% at 3 months. When I asked the reason for this drop off at the antenatal class I didn't get a real answer and was left worried that the hormones wouldn't work and that I wouldn't be able to produce milk. I now know that the body does its thing and produces milk, the reason for this drop off is that breastfeeding is hard and not always enjoyable. I think it is important to be open and honest about these difficulties so that new mums have realistic expectations. It took me nearly 3 months to be really happy breastfeeding, so in a bid to be open and honest here are my pros and cons of breastfeeding:
Pros
All the health benefits which are widely known and drilled into you during pregnancy - no need to repeat here.
All the health benefits which are widely known and drilled into you during pregnancy - no need to repeat here.
Night feeds. Everyone needs to feed in the night but breastfeeding is so much easier than having to warm up bottles at 2am! Just get baby up, feed, burp, settle, then back to bed (ok this is a massive oversimplification!). Not sure I would have been able to cope if I had to mess around with bottles in the middle of the night whilst having a screaming baby.
Daytime outings. You don't have to remember to bring sterilised bottles, formula, and hot water with you everywhere you go! It must take so much organisation to leave the house if you are using a bottle!
It is lovely thing to do once feeding is established, although I only really understood this after I gave my daughter a bottle of expressed milk which was such a sterile experience!
It's an easy way to get your baby to sleep. This is controversial as feeding to sleep is supposed to create bad habits but the fact remains, feed and they relax and go to sleep!
The 300 - 500 calories is it supposed to burn! Like doing a boot camp every day without trying! Just don't eat loads of cake to compensate like I did!!!
Cons
You are the only one who can feed which means you are always on call, you will find it difficult to leave the house without your baby in toe, and it will be you waking up every time in the night! I found this was the biggest difficulty, I felt as though all I was good for was as a pair of udders, especially with all the hormones in the first weeks. I hated breastfeeding in the beginning because of this and it took me a good three months before I felt that I could continue to breastfeed for a year. From talking to other mums it is totally normal to dislike breastfeeding in the beginning, it doesn't mean that you are a bad mum. To add to this you also feel a load of guilt for contemplating bottle feeding when you are having these low points. Just know that it does get better if you have the energy to persevere.
You will be constantly feeding especially in the early weeks is really tough. I was cluster feeding constantly between 11pm and 4am and was absolutely knackered. It does get a lot better after about a month or so, but during the early weeks it is hard to imagine that it will, and the allure of a bottle of formula is really strong! The thoughts of bottle feeding where particularly strong in the middle of the night when it is easy to think 'if I stick a bottle in her mouth, fill her up, and then she would sleep for ages!'. You may also find that people around you comment on how often you are feeding making you think that you are not producing enough milk or are doing it wrong, however it is totally normal to feed a lot, and it does get a lot better with the feeds getting shorter and more spaced out.
It doesn't hurt but in the early weeks when they are feeding all the time and their suck is really strong it can make you feel very sore. It does get better, and in the end is totally painless, but it is hard to feed through this pain in the first weeks and to believe that it won't hurt in the end. Use nipple cream after every feed and warm cloths on your breasts.
I don't like the thought of exposing myself in public so I was really worried about feeding when out and about, and in particular in front of friends and family. I started using a scarf but I found this annoying as it would fall off my shoulder and it was difficult to see what I was doing. I ended up getting a feeding scarf from Babe au Lait, which has a hoop that allows you to see what you are doing and has made things so much easier!
Breastfeeding is easy but sometimes the advice makes it seem as though it is a technical process, lots of talk of fore milk / hind milk, attachment, feeding positions, length of time on each side, always offering the second side but also having to 'drain the breast' and going back to the same side after an hour, milk supply, foods to avoid etc it can be so confusing! I just keep it simple start with the side she last finished on and continue until she comes off, burp then offer the next side. This works for me and she is growing well.
Mastitis and blocked ducts. I haven't experienced these but when they occur they are nasty and painful and even though you have painful breasts you still need to feed from them. Plus the thought of mastitis makes me feel like I am a dairy cow!
Nursing bras are the fastest way to look matronly and for your boobs to hide your waste!!!
Your boobs will leak which is super embarrassing when you forget to use a breast pad! Plus breast pads are super annoying, every time I feed the pad detaches and ends up scrunched up in your bra! At night your breasts will leak, the first time this happened to me I thought I had wet myself!!! This means sleeping in your bra and breast pads or a waterproof sheet, not very dignified!!!
So these are my pros and cons of breastfeeding, and even though on this list there are way more cons than pros, and it is totally normal to dislike breastfeeding in the first few months, perseverance and support means I am now really happy with this feeding method. What I don't want to do is put people off breastfeeding, instead for those who are contemplating breastfeeding I want to provide realistic expectations so that new mums go into it with their eyes wide open and don't get put off too early. Hopefully this post helps to do that!
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